Łyńdzej, 22 marcie 2004 o.

Baltic League convenes in Danzig

DANZIG (WASP) — In response to the recent events in the West Indies and to rumours about the explosion of a nuclear weapon on or near the Cruzan Islands, the leaders of the Baltic League have convened yesterday at an emergency meeting in Danzig. It was called by prince Timotieje II of Skuodia. Purpose of the summit, which lasted less than four hours, was to discuss the League's stance in the conflict between Scandinavia and Florida-Caribbea, and if possible to issue a joint statement. The following resolution was adopted and read aloud by Danzig's upper mayor, Holger Bolle:

"The Baltic League, convened in the Free City of Danzig, on March 21, 2004, represented here by the prince of Skuodia, the upper mayor of Danzig, the chancellor of the Republic of the Two Crowns, and the prime ministers of Estonia, Finland, Latvia, Lybæk, Mecklenburg, Nassina, Preymeren, Rygen, Slesvik-Holstein, and Sweden, as well the president of Ukraine,

(1) SHARPLY CONDEMNS all acts of violence undertaken by Florida-Caribbea against the population of the Cruzan Islands;

(2) DEMANDS the immediate withdrawal of the Floridian military from the Cruzan Islands;

(3) STRONGLY URGES the Floridian government to respect the outcome of a democratically held referendum regarding the status of the Cruzan Islands;

(4) URGES its members to terminate their relations, both diplomatic and commercial, with Florida-Caribbea until the conditions as formulated in this resolution have been met;

(5) ALSO DECIDES to close down its office in Miami, effective immediately, until the same conditions have been met;

(6) REAFFIRMS that any act of violence against the Scandinavian Realm will be treated as an act of violence against the Baltic League;

(7) SPEAKS OUT ITS HOPE that the conflict will not further escalate, and that it can be settled peacefully."

The resolution was signed by the representatives of all League members except Latvia. Prime minister Alksnis, a personal friend of the Floridian-Caribbean dictator Bush, refused to take a stance in the war as long as it has not been decisively proven that an atomic bomb was indeed used, and if so, that it was the Scandinavians themselves who set it off.

In the meantime, the explosion of an atomic bomb on the island of Sankt Thomas has been confirmed officially, although it is not yet clear who is responsible for it. The governments of Florida-Caribbea and Scandinavia accuse each other mutually, although most observers are convinced that it was the new Floridian junta, led by general Silva-Gonzales, who set off the bomb as a demonstration of its power.

Russia offers to mediate

MOSCOW (WASP) — President Igor Arensky of the Russian Federation, reelected last week, has offered to act as an intermediary in peace talks between Florida-Caribbea and the Scandinavian Realm. "This entire conflict is unnecessary," he said. "If not one country after another had started to meddle with what basically still is a Floridian internal matter, this whole thing would never have escalated into what seems like the beginning of a nuclear war between different states." Arensky called both parties for calmth and wisdom, and said: "What we need now is not a coalition of countries that hope to gain profit from Florida's defeat; what we really need is a strong, neutral state that can mediate in the conflict and help settle it peacefully." To effectuate his proposal, Arensky has sent his foreign minister, Valentin Kugelman, to Gøteborg and Miami to discuss it with both governments.