Sobota, 27 marcie 2004 o.

Triumphal procession in Miami

MIAMI (WASP) — One day after his arrival to Florida, general Marek Aldendorf, commander-in-chief of the armed forces of the RTC in the occupation zone Southeast Florida, has made a ceremonial procession through the city of Miami. Under the cheers of thousands, Aldendorf made his round in an armed, black limousine, previously property of ex-president Bush. For reasons of security, the general could only wave his hand to the enthousiastic crowd from within his car.

"That must have been disappointing for the people of Florida," Aldendorf's security chief, colonel Marcinu told us. "I'm sure they wanted to see more of the man who liberated them from the yoke of those usurpers. But unfortunately, we cannot afford such risks. Behind every friendly, smiling face, a terrorist may be hidden, and we have reasons enough to believe that at every single point of his route at least twenty guns were pointed to his limo, eagerly waiting for the general to come out."

Nevertheless, the Republic's occupational force in Florida has made significant progress on its first day. Marcinu: "The attitude of the local population towards us is extremely friendly. In fact, the warmth with which we were welcomed is overwhelming. Not without a reason, of course. Due to our presence in the streets of Miami, most fightings and raids have been stopped. Thanks to us, people feel safe again. Until now, about 800 criminals have been arrested. Those elements that still try to disrupt order better watch their steps!"

In the meantime, the process of "de-Bushification" has already started. The enormous, 27 Venedic feet high statue of former president Jaime Bush has been taken down and crushed into pieces; the remnants will be used for a bronze statue of Frydryk Chopin, 32 Venedic feet high, which will be erected already in the second half of April. All pictures and paintings of Bush have been removed and burnt. The Avenida Presidente Bush has been renamed "Avenida Rey Witold IV"; the direction of the famous Hotel Jaime has decided to rename it "the Aldendorf Hotel".

The success in Florida can also be felt in the RTC itself. The Sejm has appointed a special commission to investigate whether the Venedic language should become an obligatory subject in Floridian schools or merely a facultative one, and in all major cities of the Republic drafting bureaus have been opened, where people can gain information about the possibilities of a new life at the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, or even apply for immediate emigration.